Daniel J. Stencel
LOWVILLE TOWNSHIP -- Daniel J. Stencel, age 83, passed away peacefully surrounded by his loving family on Friday, June 23, 2023, at his home in Poynette, WI.
Dan was born on October 11, 1939, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin to Joseph and Gertrude (Skwierawski) Stencel. The family lived on Dousman Street in Milwaukee before moving to a small farm in Hamilton, Wisconsin where Dan grew up with his three brothers, Jerry, Dave, and Jim. The Stencel boys enjoyed country life and may have, at times, found themselves in a bit of trouble. For instance, Dan managed to crash his first car before he even had a license. The brothers’ early love of the outdoors, fostered by their Uncle George Skwierawski, continued throughout their lives as all became avid hunters and fishermen. Sometimes the wildlife came home with them, like the raccoon and ferret they kept as pets.
Dan was a drummer, playing in a 2-man band with his older brother Jerry (on accordion). Later he played in the Cedarburg High School Band and Thunderbolts Drum and Bugle Corps. Dan freely admitted that one reason for playing drums in school was that girls outnumbered boys by 2 to 1 in the percussion section. In addition to drums, Dan played high school basketball for 4 years and was also an altar boy at the local Catholic church. To make money he caddied at the Ozaukee Country Club and “set pins” at the bowling alley.
After graduating from Cedarburg High School in 1957, Dan was accepted to the University of Wisconsin Madison, the first member of his family to attend college. A brief stint in the US Air Force delayed his education slightly, but a medical issue resulted in his honorable discharge and he was off to Madison. Dan worked several jobs to put himself through college including bartender/bouncer at The Pub on State Street and head waiter at a fraternity house’s cafeteria.
One of his best friends from high school, Fred Berhens, and Fred’s girlfriend Jan introduced Dan to one of Jan’s Tri-Delta sisters, a brilliant and beautiful young lady from Port Washington named Andrea Woodward. Andy was one of the first women admitted to the Chemical Engineering program at Madison, but as Dan graduated she dropped out of school to marry him and start a family. Their first child, Lisa, arrived on April 24, 1963. They moved to Milwaukee where Dan started his career with the Wisconsin Department of Revenue (WDOR). They spent much time with family, where Lisa received excessive doting as the first Stencel grandchild. They welcomed a second child, Doug, on February 24, 1965, shortly after Dan’s mother died from breast cancer.
In a few years, they moved back to Madison, buying their first home on Lake Mendota Drive. Dan continued working at the WDOR, specializing in Inheritance and Income Tax. He saved money by walking to work at Building L over the Blackhawk golf course. Dan’s father, Joey, developed heart troubles and Dan insisted he move in with the family, building a new bedroom in the exposed basement which overlooked the garden on which Joey lavished attention for the remainder of his life. Joey gladly assisted with watching his grandkids, which allowed Andrea to go back to college and finish her Chemistry degree at Madison. As Lisa and Doug progressed through Spring Harbor Elementary School, Joey provided after-school supervision while Dan and Andrea worked.
Dan tirelessly strove to make his family’s dreams come true. He built a triangular, wooden tree fort in the backyard for the kids. He built a 2-story high deck around the back of their house so they could overlook the backyard towards Spring Harbor on Lake Mendota. They bought a small farm in Mt Horeb for Arabian horses, Andrea’s cherished dream. Horses need hay so Dan got the family together to clear rocks from a hilltop field to create a hayfield and found a local farmer willing to plant and harvest for a share of the crop. Horses need a barn, so Dan and Andy created a flat spot to build one by digging, by hand with shovels, into the hill about six feet deep and sixty feet across.
In addition to horse stalls and a hayloft, the barn provided a parking spot for “the bus”, an old school bus converted into a camper. Dan, fondly remembering the trips “Up North” with his family to a small farm bought by his parents in the Nicolet National Forest, took the family on lots of camping trips. They visited Devils Lake, Castle Rock, and many other Wisconsin parks. They also drove west to visit Yellowstone, Glacier, Grand Tetons, the Badlands, Mt. Rushmore, and other sites.
Of course, Dan also made regular trips Up North with his brothers, his dad, and his family. Joey would spend most of the summer picking berries. Dan would bring up Andy and the kids to visit or when time came to pick-up his dad at summer’s end. The fall trips mostly involved hunting: deer, grouse, and eventually black bears. Dan and his brothers maintained a friendly rivalry about the number and size of almost anything they hunted or fished. Many feet of Super8 movies survive of Dan and one or more brothers pantomiming their hunt with the trophy laid out before them. Such films normally ended with highly exaggerated handshaking and back-slapping to make clear which brother found success. Dan hunted with bow and gun but favored the bow. His first black bear, Big Daddy, wandered through the yard of the Up North cottage. Dan set up a blind the next day and brought down the 600+ pound boar with a single arrow from his recurve bow.
After Joey passed away in 1976, Dan made Andy’s dream of horses outside her bedroom window come true by buying a forty-acre farm outside Poynette, Wisconsin. He and Andy both put up with forty-five-minute commutes to/from downtown Madison so that Andy’s Arabian horses could wake her for a morning feeding with whinnies from the barnyard forty feet from the back door. Lisa and Doug, now in Middle and High school, also became avid riders. Dan took an annual ride, with a pillow tied to the saddle, to “get his money’s worth,” the embarrassment of his family notwithstanding.
Although purchased for the horses, Dan soon found the woods and fields of Poynette offered multiple hunting and fishing opportunities. He regularly hunted deer in his back woods, sometimes coming in with an icicle hanging from his nose on Christmas Eve when hunting “Special Season.” With the Poynette Game Farm up the road, Dan also found numerous pheasants on his property. Although Andy gamely cooked up everything he brought home, the family learned to bite gingerly into grouse and pheasants to avoid breaking a tooth on a BB.
Although the family moved out, they never truly left Madison. In summer they went boating on Lake Mendota, often anchoring off Picnic Point to swim and picnic. Dan remained an avid UW-Madison Badger fan, with season tickets to football and hockey. When the Badgers returned to the Rose Bowl after an over 4 decade absence, he brought his entire family to Pasadena for Rose Bowl week. Long before they attended UW-Madison, Lisa and Doug sang Varsity with their parents at every game. When the Badger hockey team reached the NCAA finals, Dan and Andy drove across the country to cheer them on - twice!
As the kids got older, the vacations became more exotic: NYC, Hawaii, Mexico, Jamaica, etc. Dan saved for two years for each trip, planning carefully to find the best deals. They usually stayed at hotels off the beach, took flights at odd times, and found other ways to economize but his family gathered a lifetime of happy memories around the world. Both his children continue to love travel and passed down that love to Dan’s grandchildren.
Dan worked his entire professional career at the WDOR, making and keeping many great friends. Co-workers regularly sought his advice on difficult tax issues, and he handled the biggest Inheritance Tax cases for the Department. His office held so many stacks of case files, passersby could not easily tell if Dan was working at his desk behind that wall of paper. He also served as social coordinator for many Department get-togethers. He hosted annual parties at Poynette with swimming in the pool, volleyball in the front yard, and softball in the hay field. Andy and the kids provided horseback rides for the little ones. Dan loved planning a great party and insisted on planning and being Master of Ceremonies at his own retirement party, a rollicking success!
Dan’s brothers describe him as “the Rock” of the family, helping all with taxes, legal issues, parental care, medical care, and any number of other issues. Dan helped many friends and family members. He provided tax advice, help moving, financial support, and help with medical issues. Out of all Dan’s acts of kindness and compassion, one stands far above the rest. His beloved wife, Andrea, was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease at age 40. Her terror at the prognosis she shared only with a few, how this heartless disease would slowly strip her of her mobility and mental acumen. She told Dan her fear of being institutionalized for her final years, locked within a body she could no longer control and unable to communicate to her loved ones. As Parkinson’s stole her ability to walk, her livelihood, her horse riding, her speech, and eventually her life, Dan’s devotion never wavered. With the help of family and dear friends, Dan made sure Andy lived at home, still greeted by the happy whinnies of her horses each day, until the end of her life at 60. More importantly, he kept her in the very center of family life. She came to every birthday, Christmas, and other event. Steadied by her family, she held her first three grandchildren in her arms. And even the travel continued, with family outings to Disney World, Key Largo, Marco Island, San Francisco, and Washington, D.C.
Equally important were the little trips Dan arranged - fishing the Mecan, visiting Up North, etc. The two regularly went fishing together, Dan bringing Andy’s seat to the waterside, baiting her hook, and joyously celebrating her success as he netted her trophies - no matter how small. Andy’s excitement became so great she often wiggled right off her seat, rolling on the ground still holding her rod and reel until Dan came to rescue her while continuing his congratulations on her big catch!
Before and after Andy’s passing, Dan doted on his grandchildren. He always had candy to share when he saw them. He tried to attend every soccer game, piano recital, band concert, school play and musical, bringing Andy until her passing and, after she was gone, reminding the grandkids how proud she would be of them for each of their activities. He made special Easter baskets for them each year with candy, toys and movies. He annually built a haunted house for Halloween and dressed up to give them a good scare - and an extravagant amount of candy! Dan taught his grandkids how to fish, holding a competition for the biggest fish each year Up North. He often challenged them to swimming races in his pool, letting them win until the last second when he would pull their legs backwards, stealingvictory. He passed along the tradition of singing Varsity at Badger hockey games to a second generation. He attended Grandparents University at UW-Madison with each of the four grandchildren, including brats and ice cream at Memorial Union Terrace.
Dan believed in the importance of a good education, encouraged his kids and grandkids to go to college, and served on the Poynette School Board and PoynetteLibrary Board. After Andrea’s death he and his children funded two scholarships each year for Poynette graduating seniors pursuing science in college. Dan believed in incentives, offering his kids and later his grandkids cash for A’s, Dean’s List and for good report cards. He and Andrea saved diligently for their kids’ college educations and for his grandkids he continued this tradition up until his death.
Dan can be remembered for many accomplishments, but we think his favorite accolade might be “family man.” A great son, incredible dad and granddad, super brother, and a husband of unmatched love and devotion, Daniel Stencel put family before everything. The stars cannot bound, nor the oceans hold the sum of our grief at his passing, but mountains of love he left behind lifts us to the stars, beyond which he has flown.
Dan is survived by his children, Lisa (Philip) Nelson, and Douglas (Rachael) Stencel; grandchildren, Emily (Orrie) Walsvik, Erika Nelson, Travis Nelson, and Madeline Stencel; siblings, David (Wendy) Stencel, and James (Lorraine) Stencel; sister-in-law, Marcia Linton; nieces, nephews, other relatives, and many friends, including his special friend and companion Cecelia Quinlan. He was preceded in death by his wife Andrea Stencel; parents Joseph and Gertrude Stencel; and brother Gerald Stencel.
A Memorial Service will be held at Christ Lutheran Church in DeForest, Wisconsin, on Saturday, July 22, 2023, at 10:30 A.M. with Rev. Sue Beadle officiating. A visitation before the funeral starts at 9:00 A.M. in the Fellowship Room of the church, ending at 10:30. A luncheon will follow the service at Rex’s Innkeeper in Waunakee, Wisconsin.
Flowers may be sent to Christ Lutheran Church and for those interested the family suggests memorials be made to the University of Wisconsin Foundation.
The family would like to thank Sarah Gabbei and the staff from Promedica Hospice for their care and support.
Pflanz Mantey Mendrala Funeral Home in Poynette is assisting the family.
